anitalobo’s posterous

Busting a few stereotypes, early

Girl/ 5 y.o.: I want to be an astronaut

Boy/ 8 y.o.: Girls are not astronauts, only boys go to space.

Girl: I want to play football

Boy: Girls don’t play football, only boys do

 

Overhearing this a few months ago sent up a huge red flag with me, on how early stereotypes are set.

Probably much earlier than 5, as kids watch cartoons where mummy is always making stuff in the kitchen; girls are always dolled up in pink; and boys are always super-heroes or doing cool stuff.

Turning off the TV isn’t enough of a solution.

At playgrounds, girls get shepherded to ‘safe’ games like swinging and skipping and not kicking around a football.

Well I don’t know what the big solution is, or if there is any escaping gender stereotypes at all?

So what I did was showing evidence that busted stereotypes. Simple stuff really.

Using pictures from the daily paper:

Men who are chefs and women pilots. Women who play basketball; men who figure skate. Male models and women car rallyists!

Proof that women & men can take on any role they want. I have never been more appreciative of the power of photographs!

Mythology is a great source:

Stories are powerful tools. Indian mythology is replete with stories of Kali, Parvati, Durga, Lakshmi – women goddesses who are revered. Their stories exemplify that women are powerful too!

What mom does everyday, matters most!

‘What mom does’ exerts a very big influence on a child’s notions of stereotype – both male and female.

When a child watches their mother work [home/office] and be independent, they’re far more likely to understand male-female equality in their heart as much as their mind.

A big moment for the 8 year old boy was proudly telling his friends, ‘my mom drives a car’.

A big moment for the 5 year old girl was playing football with mom and all the neighbourhood kids. And flat-out races for girls and boys together!

We all know that stereotypes set artificial limits on both girls and boys.

Limits that need to be done away with quickly, gently, firmly and early before they settle in.

The two kids are my children – and this story is yours too.

I’d love to know how you bust stereotypes.

 

What did you discover at school today?

Have you felt that strange surprise at the first ‘nothing much’ reply?

As parents we can either live with this response or get worried enough to meet the teacher. Then what?

Schools and parents focus on ‘academic excellence is the passport to a better future’, especially in India. There is a huge disconnect between what’s taught at schools and the life-skills children need in a rapidly changing world.

Worse, the sense of wonder and discovery which makes childhood a lifetime memory fades pretty quickly under the demands of school work!

So I’ve put together a wish list of the ‘discovery opportunities’ we could bring to our children during school life. Please do add your wish-list and share this with friends.

 

MUSIC / ART

Music lessons twice a week – different instruments every year

Art appreciation

Theatre

Dance: Modern and traditional/ folk dances

 

SPORT

At least one hour of sport every day for all kids, not just the athletic ones

This could fun stuff such as flying kites and even traditional sport such as the Indian kalaripayattu which is the oldest martial art form.

 

EXPERIMENT

Fridays devoted to ‘practical’s i.e. doing experiments about stuff that’s studied over the week

Understanding science by experimenting

Spending a night outdoors under the stars to understand astronomy & the interconnectedness of all things

 

INSPIRE

Interactive sessions [guest lectures] from alumni who have ‘made it’ in different fields

Children studying in private schools ‘friend’ an underprivileged child

Reward inspiring teachers –all this won’t be possible without inspiring teachers

 

WONDER

Field trips to local wildlife sanctuaries/ animal rescue centres

Watching a match – cricket/ hockey/ football

Magic tricks

 

Now, I’d like your views on:

Will these activities over-burden the child?

I don’t advocate over-programming a child’s life, over-burdening teachers or pushing children to ‘perform’ at these activities! Exploring a forest or making sand-castles on a beach are exciting too!

Should these activities be evaluated in some way?

Can these be tests? How can you measure curiosity? Or the charming memories a child carries into adulthood.

Classmates or parents: what’s better?

While many of these activities take place outside schools, my personal view is that children find the whole experience more exciting when its with classmates, when they’re more likely to act independently and not expect to be ‘babied’ as they would with parents! What do you think?

Who’s responsible?

These activities can be done over a calendar year, if they are planned together by the school, teachers and parents. As parents, it’s convenient for us to think it’s the school’s responsibility to organise everything. The truth is, no school, however well-endowed can do this alone. Parents have to respond and collaborate with schools, for the magic to unfold!

 

In case you’re wondering, what’s bothering me?

As a parent I am concerned. Our children are at risk of losing a sense of wonder, while negotiating the rigors of modern education. It is the urge to discover things that I seek to foster by making available varied opportunity. A fertile mind, I believe, is better prepared to explore life’s challenges with confidence.

This post came about after several conversations with friends who have school-going kids and share this concern. The immediate trigger was reading Leo Babauta’s ‘Education Needs to Be Turned on Its Head’ http://bit.ly/xHido [do check out the post and reader comments].

These thoughts are still evolving. I am taking a bit of a risk here by sharing a construct that’s a work-in-progress, which I hope will grow and sharpen in dialogue with you.

I intend to share this with as many school principals, teachers and educators – everyone who is willing to listen and help create change!

For small changes often herald big movements.